


Blessed are the Neutral

by Kereea



Category: Deadpool (Comics), Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Chaos, Friendship, Multi, neutral parties, neutrality rules
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-27
Updated: 2013-01-27
Packaged: 2017-11-27 05:01:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/658273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kereea/pseuds/Kereea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Every year at Marvel Academy the heroes and villains go at it for prank month in the spring and the neutral students pick sides. But Loki has other ideas in store…</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Newbie

“Party all night til the cows come home!”

“Shut up Wilson!” Loki yelled, before jamming his headphones back on.

“He doesn’t even like country usually,” Matt muttered, going back to his book. “What the hell is wrong with him?”

“Do you want the real answer?” Neena asked.

“I always wondered if it was residual “gets banged by a telepath” syndrome,” Felicia purred.

“This has nothing to do with me,” Nathan snapped, tying up a garbage bag. “He was like that when I met him.” He glared at the five on the couch. “Help?”

“Ask your boyfriend,” Pietro said, flipping through some papers. “Damn it, none of the new girls are up to my—hello!”

Loki leaned over, “Bruce Banner’s cousin. Don’t do it.”

“Aww,” Pietro whined.

“Party all night til the sun comes up!” Wade yelled.

“It’s eleven a.m. you idiot!” Neena snapped.

“We won’t stop dancin’ til we’ve had enough!” Wade continued, hopping onto the table.

“I’m going to my room. You may send my new roommate in when he arrives,” Loki said, picking up his notebooks.

“Does no one care if this place is clean?” Nathan demanded, his glowing eye flashing dangerously.

“There ain’t no boss and there ain’t no phone! Gonna party all night TIL THE COWS COME HOME!” Wade howled.

Loki sighed and put his book in his bag. Sometimes life in the Bell Tower wasn’t worth it.

“Wade don’t you dare strip!” Nathan yelled.

Loki groaned. They had freshman on campus in two hours and one was going to be Loki’s roommate.

The Bell Tower was a tower on the back of the “neutral” dorm and was probably the only true neutral territory on campus, barring the cafeteria. Usually it only held the “true neutrals” who didn’t have any alignment past freshman year. Having a freshman move right in was odd, to say the least. 

The main parting of the ways event started in February and ran through March-aka-prank-month. It was where alignments were finally chosen.

The dorm itself tended to segregate early though, with the villains on the left of the elevators and the heroes on the right. Loki loved to sometimes go to random floors and watch fights break out.

Loki had the second highest room in the tower, with the girls above him, Pietro and Matt one floor down, and Nate and Wade just above the common area exclusive to the Bell Tower. It had been decided that Wade “Deadpool” Wilson could not be on a floor above anyone else because he ran and jumped and danced too much and was way too loud. Loki didn’t know how Nathan managed.

.o.o.o.

Loki’s door shook as someone kicked it. He got off his bed with a sigh—right as he had found the page he wanted on healing potions. Of course.

It was Matt and a small brunette boy. Matt was beaming widely. This was…interesting.

Matt clapped the boy on the back, “Loki, this is Peter Parker. His uncle worked in my dad’s law practice for a long time.” Peter flinched. “Oh, um, sorry, I guess…I’ll tell you the rest if he doesn’t. Anyway, be nice to him or I’ll kick your ass!”

Loki smirked, “Matt, you’re pointing over my shoulder.”

“Damn it,” Matt muttered. “Wade’s singing messed up my hearing. Anyway, take care of the kid.”

“You say ‘anyway’ a lot lately,” Loki said as Peter brought his two suitcases and backpack into the room. Matt tossed a bag with a comforter and some pillows after him—It hit Loki in the head.

Loki huffed as he shut the door, “And that is why blind people shouldn’t throw things.”

“Um, hi,” Peter said, holding out his hand. “So…you’re Loki? Matt’s told me about you…over the summer…”

“Oh,” Loki said, setting the bedding down. He shook Peter’s hand. “So…you want to be a hero or a villain?”

“Hero,” Peter said instantly.

“Pity. You won’t stay here long then,” Loki said. “I can get you in touch with my brother’s friends; they’re in the Heroes’ A-Block.”

“Oh, okay,” Peter said. “Um, you?”

“I’m just avoiding villain like crazy right now,” Loki said calmly. “So, you have any powers?”

“Um…I sort of have spider-powers. And the evaluator said he thinks I’m a super-genius,” Peter aid.

“Well, if he’s correct, hello fellow super-genius,” Loki said. “With your genius, I hope you have noticed that the right half of the room is bare and is therefore yours.”

Peter laughed, “Nice. And here I was hoping I got the pre-decorated side.”

Loki chuckled, “I might just be able to stand you, kid.”

Loki went back to his book as Peter began to set up his side of the room. Loki eyed his color choices-red, black, and blue primarily. He might need to present him to Steve Rogers, Thor’s friend and the football captain…who was frozen in ice sixty years ago as an eighteen year old after taking super serum. Loki had so far given him “most tragic past.” 

Tony Stark had “most traumatic past” due to the whole “getting kidnapped by mercenaries and nearly killed for his dad’s money and now has a machine in his chest” thing. Loki could almost stand him. Sometimes.

“Hey, Loki.”

Loki looked up, “Yes?”

“You never said what you did,” Peter said.

“Oh. I’m demigod and a sorcerer,” Loki replied. “I’ll be a full god in a few decades, once I come into my full power.”

“Cool. Is your brother a sorcerer too?” Peter asked.

“Hardly,” Loki muttered. “He is a warrior and weather elemental.”

“Oh, that’s cool too,” Peter said. “So, what kind of a sorcerer are you?”

Loki’s brow rose—so the boy knew there were different types. “I suppose I am what you would call a true sorcerer. I practice all forms of magic and am limited only by my energy and knowledge.”

“Oh, okay,” Peter said. “I know one of the magic teachers here—Stephen Strange.”

Loki nodded, “Dr. Strange is a good teacher. If only they would give Baron Mordo a separate class to teach instead of making him the doctor’s assistant, I might learn something.”

“That’s a bit harsh,” Peter chuckled. “Any great freshman teachers?”

“Good or evil? Oh, wait, you already told me—good,” Loki asked. “They’ll indoctrinate you quickly if you’re not careful.”

“Oh, um, good. I mean, I want to be a hero,” Peter said. “Even if a lot of people seem to think my “origin” would make me a good villain, I want to be a hero.”

“Let us hear this origin and find out,” Loki decided. “Then I’ll tell you what you want to know.”

Peter shrugged, “Long story short, I went to a science expo, got bitten by a super-spider, got spider-like powers, got cocky and used them in a wrestling ring to get money, didn’t stop a guy who robbed the place because they gipped me, and the guy later robbed somewhere else and killed my uncle.”

“…Where’s the villainy in that?” Loki asked. “Have these people never read Batman?”

“My best friend’s dad…he’s a supervillain. We just found out. And he just got hired here as a sort of parole,” Peter said sheepishly. “And…he always goes on about he wishes I was his son instead of Harry and how we need to team up. He wants to be my advisor.”

Loki twitched. That was bad, really bad. “Who is your advisor?”

“Erik Magnus. You know, mostly evil but still a nice person?” Peter asked. “He said he’d get me transferred to Professor Xavier if I wanted.”

“Erik is a good man. He was my advisor until they realized I was staying neutral, and then I got Uatu,” Loki said. “He’s in charge of this dorm and does nothing save occasionally inform you of academic requirements and school events.” He marked his place and shut his book, “Xavier might be good for you. Might I also recommend Dr. Strange, however? He’s very good for those with…more traumatic origins, and you already know him.”

“Thanks. No school therapist then?” Peter asked. 

“We have a school mediator,” Loki replied. “There are no therapists.”

“That’s weird. I mean I think a lot of villains issues could be solved with therapy,” Peter replied.

“Ah, then you will end up in R-Dorm if that idea persists,” Loki said. “That’s for the heroes who want to rehabilitate villains, not just lock them up. Hank Pym goes there; he’s on the paper with me.”

Peter perked up, “There’s a school paper? Do you have a photographer?”

“No. Why?” Loki asked. “Wait, why am I asking that—you want to do it, don’t you?”

“Well, yeah. Who’s the editor?”

“Nathan, he lives downstairs,” Loki said casually. “Want the job? Mac Gargan got fired for taking locker room photos. I can convince Nathan easily.”

“Really?” Peter asked.

“Sure, I drop the right words to Wade and Nathan at different points and it will happen,” Loki said.

“Who’s Wade?” Peter asked.

“Wade Wilson, aka Deadpool—he’s already picked his super-name—was a kid who got massive cancer when he was sixteen and went through a bunch of treatments that gave him a healing factor to fight the cancer. He’s insane and wants to be the world’s best mercenary. Do not engage in too much early contact with him or you will go mad,” Loki said. “He will be dancing on a table before orientation is over.”

“And Nathan?” Peter asked.

“A time-traveler. He’s actually older than his dad, who’s here right now. He has telepathy, telekinesis, and a techo-organic virus that I do not understand well,” Loki said. “He loves to help people. Ask him if you need anything. I mean anything.”

“Cool. So…um, any teachers to avoid?” Peter asked.

“I can’t help you there for general ed,” Loki said. “All freshman classes have one good and one evil teacher so you know which you prefer. Whichever teacher’s assignments you gravitate towards indicates your later placement. Don’t worry if Dr. Richards and Dr. Doom start trying to kill each other mid-lesson.”

“Oh, okay,” Peter said, going back to his things. He went rigid, “Wait, what!?!”

Loki smiled. Ah, freshmen.

.o.o.o.

“Quiet please,” Uatu said serenely. No one in the hall quieted. “Please, quiet.”

Loki huffed and folded his arms. He elbowed Wade. “Oi, Wilson!”

Wade started to stand, before shooting Nathan a look. The cyborg shrugged. Wade leaped up into his chair, “SHUT THE HELL UP!”

The shout echoed throughout the whole hall. Wade grinned so widely it was visible though his ever-present mask and dropped back into his chair, “Go for it, Watch-man!”

Uatu sighed, “Thank you Mr. Wilson. Now, you are all freshmen, and I am sure you have many questions. The seven students on the stage are all still-neutral upperclassmen and will be glad to help you.”

Pietro made faces at the crowd and Loki pointedly looked away. Felicia blew a few kisses. 

Uatu scowled at them briefly, “Now, you may think you know what alignment you would like-” he was cut off with shouts of “HEROI” and “VILLAIN!” for a few minutes. Loki was shocked at how excited the “villains” sounded. “-what alignment you would like, but that may change this year. Most of your classes will allow you to explore your true desires.”

“I desire those lovely ladies up there!” one boy yelled.

Pietro leaned over to Neena, “Read his file—Donny Mitch. Room 312.”

“He pays at dawn,” Neena whispered to Felicia, who nodded.

“You may have noticed that you are all different ages,” Uatu continued, looking a bit pained. “We accept people aged fifteen to twenty-five as freshmen, but do not room adults with minors. Being older than an upperclassman means nothing—they are more experienced and will act accordingly.”

“Ah, the ass-kicking of over-cocky freshmen,” Wade sighed. “How I long for it.”

“You know, my new roommate is a good photographer,” Loki commented. “He could get some great pictures of that.”

“Sweet,” Wade said.

“Loki, what are you doing?” Matt hissed.

“Peter wanted a job on the paper. I’m helping,” Loki replied. “Looks like there are a few jock-types in the back. Let’s see if they come after me, hmm?” He couldn’t quite stifle his grin.

“See, that’s why people want to put you in the villain dorm,” Neena sighed.

Loki rolled his eyes. Tomorrow was when the real fun started anyway.


	2. Hark, the Schedule Angels Sing

“Naaaaaate, you totally ruined my mystique for the kiddies,” Wade whined as the eight students made their way back up to the bell tower. “I totally had them thinking I’d do it, but no, you had to be all “Wade never takes his mask off” and totally disinterest them! Babes like mystery, Nate, but not if they’ll never find out!” Nathan just rolled his eyes.

“Why do you want “babes” anyway? You’re dating Nathan,” Matt huffed.

“Babes…like…mystery…” Pietro muttered as he wrote it on his hand.

“God help us all,” Felicia groaned, taking her pen back.

“Right. Loki, help, now,” Neena said cheekily.

“Go jump off a cliff,” Loki grumbled. 

Peter just looked between the others, seeming a bit lost. Loki groaned. “Wonderful. We traumatized the freshman already. Great job, everyone.” He took Peter’s shoulder, “Okay, let’s get you to bed before you head explodes.”

“It’ll explode anyways, because I’m totally full of head-exploding awesomeness!” Wade yelled.

“Shut up or I’ll make your head explode!” Loki snapped.

“Loki, no blowing up Wade’s skull all willy-nilly,” Nathan sighed.

“Right, only Nate gets to be willy-nilly with it. The rest of you need a good reason to blow up my skull!” Wade laughed, hugging Nathan.

Loki frowned at Nathan, “As recompense for Deadpool, who I remind you that you take responsibility for, rendering him catatonic, I ask you consider Peter as the new photographer for the school paper.”

“You already have Wade convinced, don’t you?” Nathan asked, exasperated.

“Yes,” Loki replied, taking Peter’s arm and heading for the stairs.

.o.o.o.

“So…I’m living with crazy people,” Peter said dully as he changed into his pajamas in the bathroom.

“Correct,” Loki said though the door. “Though Deadpool prefers to be called “crazy awesome” and pouts if insane asylums are brought up. Or medical labs.”

“So, we get our schedules in the morning?” Peter asked.

“Yes. Any absolutely necessary course documents will be with them,” Loki said. “Textbooks, charts, and what have you. Supplementary materials can be gleaned from the bookstore. There’s a pamphlet saying all of this on your bed.” 

“Oh, sorry,” Peter said, exiting the bathroom. “So…what can our tower-mates do? I know Matt, he’s blind but all his other senses are beyond super but the others…”

“Neena and Felicia, aka Domino and Black Cat, both have luck powers and are training to be mercenaries, though Cat has a more thieving specialization,” Loki said. “Pietro aka Quicksilver has super-speed. Nathan aka Cable is telepathic and telekinetic, and is well-versed in all forms of fighting and firearms thanks to being chucked around about eight different timelines of warring futures. Wade aka Deadpool has the second best healing factor on campus, is an expert fighter and completely insane.” He put some toothpaste on his toothbrush, “Good enough?”

Peter nodded, picking up the pamphlet, “Yeah, thanks.”

Satisfied, Loki began brushing his teeth as Peter perused the paper (already annotated in green ink).

.o.o.o.

Loki hummed lightly at his schedule. Peter peered over his shoulder, “What’d you get?”

“Advanced Magic with Strange and Mordo, Literature’s Influence on Super-Dealings with Hank McCoy, Psychology: Breaking Your Opponent with Emma Frost, and…Magic and Science as One with Dr. Doom,” Loki sighed. “I hate that man.” He looked at Peter’s box. “You?”

“Um, there’s The Basics of Super-Beings with Reed Richards and Dr. Doom, like you told me, Science Beyond the Average with…Mr. Sinister?”

“He’s purely amoral but a fair grader and doesn’t make freshmen do anything heinous,” Loki said quickly.

“Okay…Who Am I? with Charles Xaivier, and…oh my god.”

“What?” Loki asked.

“Cultivating Your Inner Evil with Norman Osborn. Damn it!” Peter whined.

“I take it this Osborn is your friends father who wants you as an apprentice?” Loki asked. “That’s usually a second-year class too. Or an elective.”

“Yes. Kill me now. You can kill me, right?” Peter asked.

“We’ll get your advisor changed to someone who will set him straight,” Loki said. “I’m sure Thor’s friends can think of someone. Come on, we’re going to the A-Dorm.

.o.o.o.

“Whoa,” Peter said. “This place is awesome!”

“Yes, the landscaping here is always the best,” Loki agreed as they waited outside A-Dorm. “I think they have a plant-themed heroine who lives here.”

“Loki!”

Peter watched in shock as Loki was bowled over by a huge blonde guy.

“Thor, get off me!” Loki yelled.

“Thor, come on, you know your brother hates being tackled,” Another blonde said as he came up with a brunette and a dirty-blonde with a bow.

Thor quickly got up and pulled Loki to his feet, “Sorry Loki. I just missed you.”

“It’s been two days, idiot,” Loki huffed. He grabbed Peter’s arm and pointed at him. “This is Peter Parker. He needs help, preferably of Tony’s persuasion.”

The brunette’s nose wrinkled, “Dude, tell me you’re not asking me to teach a virgin-”

“No!” Loki yelled. “The other persuasion, you…oh how the hell could you even think…what?”

Peter just gaped.

“Great first impression people,” the guy with the bow said. “I’m going to go shoot things. Bye.”

.o.o.o.

“Sorry about Clint. He’s mad because Tony was up all night and didn’t let him sleep,” Steve said calmly as they settled at a picnic table.

“Seriously, I need to switch with Bruce. I hate sharing with Clint,” Tony complained.

Loki rolled his eyes, “Your father’s contributing so much that they have to screw you over a bit to show they’re not favoring you.”

“…you think?” Tony asked.

“Or they’re mad about you getting drunk off your ass every night after you turned twenty-one,” Thor suggested.

“I was doing it before that, I just didn’t make it public,” Tony grinned.

Peter still looked mildly catatonic. Loki patted his arm, “Look, the boy’s got a problem. You’re future heroes. Help him.”

“What’s the problem, Peter?” Steve asked presently.

“My advisor is a villain who wants me as his protégé but I want to be a hero,” Peter replied.

“Ouch,” Tony said. “So…what are you looking for? New advisor, fake ID, passport out of the country?”

“Shut up and let him finish, Stark,” Loki said.

“Just…just a new advisor,” Peter said.

“Oh. Okay, let me see,” Tony said, pulling out his netbook. “No, no, no…wait, what kind of hero do you want to be?”

“I don’t know. I just don’t want Norman Osborn as my advisor!” Peter said.

“Okay, okay,” Tony muttered. “Sheesh.” He looked up, “Oh, Loki. Epic party in two weeks for new students and the neutrals. You guys should come—shit! Work with me, mainframe!”

“I apologize for Tony. He may still have a slight hangover,” Thor said.

“Hm…” Tony muttered, calming again. “Shit. Your file’s locked up tight. Okay, there we go.”

“If it’s locked up tight, why did it take you only five seconds?” Loki huffed.

“Okay, most of the advisors are full up. Guess we had more than the usual admissions,” Tony said, ignoring the question. “Oh, wait, Osborn! My dad hates his guts. Fun times!”

Peter cringed. Steve sighed, “Sorry. He gets high after his hangovers end.”

“Seriously, he does,” Bruce said. “His adrenaline spikes and everything.”

“Okay, work with me baby,” Tony muttered as he continued typing. Loki knew the heroes would forgive Peter for inching away a bit.

.o.o.o.

An hour later Loki guided a speechless Peter, who now had Uatu as his advisor. It was better than nothing. “So we couldn’t get you out of the class. So what? It’s one class. Flunk it and you’re golden.”

“…What if I don’t flunk? And how do you flunk a class like that anyway?” Peter asked.

“…Watch that new My Little Pony show,” Loki declared. “It’s wholeheartedly good without killing you with diabetes. It may hold the answers.”

“…you’re serious?” Peter asked.

“It’s how I got transferred out of Annihilation for Geniuses--well, I used Lilo and Stitch,” Loki said. “But really, that show is the anti-evil. Seriously, enough references to general niceness and cute things like puppies will get you thrown out in no time!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will Loki’s plan to help Peter work? Will Tony get drunk(er) at the party? How do the classes go? Chapter Three: A Party Needs No Excuse (but Deadpool Might)

**Author's Note:**

> This really just came to me one day. Decided to try and finish it.  
> For those who don't know, Neena is Domino and Felicia is The Black Cat


End file.
